Party Of The Year

Saturday night was my best friend Jerramy's birthday party...number 28...not quite a girl...not yet a woman...but he seems to be coping with the aging process as well as expected. If you're interested in what he did exactly, here are a few pics to pass the time:



As you can see, the gifts were high-quality items found only at the best malls and street corners across the country. The term "I Leave Bite Marks" is actually a half-truth about Jerramy. Although he DOES bite, he does NOT leave marks.

By the time we got there, the party was already in full swing...



...so Jerramy knew what he had to do...LET THE GAMES BEGIN

Drink number one:


Jerramy: "You see, what I do here is...I use the straw by placing it actually IN THE DRINK."

Me: "Um, yeah...I know what a straw's for bro."

Jerramy: "Oh do you now!!!!!"

Me: "Yep"

Jerramy: "Well fine then...EINSTEIN"

Drink number two:


Jerramy: "You're cuttin' ME off ya punk!? How's about I cut YOU off!!"

Michalene: "I'm not the bartender Jerramy."

Branda: "You can take a picture of my nose...but THAT'S ALL."

Drink number three:


You need to know who Norm Peterson from "Cheers" is to appreciate this pic.

Jerramy: "Evenin' everybody."
Bar: "JERRAMY!"

Branda: "What's goin' on Mr. Barker?"
Jerramy: "Let's talk about what's goin' IN Mr. Barker."

Branda: "What are ya up to Jerramy?"
Jerramy: "My ideal weight if I were eleven feet tall."

Branda: "How's a beer sound Jerramy?"
Jerramy: "I dunno. I usually finish them before they get a word in."

Branda: "What would you say to a beer Jerramy?"
Jerramy: "Daddy wuvs you."

Branda: "What's the story Jerramy?"
Jerramy: "Boy meets beer. Boy drinks beer. Boy meets another beer."

Drink number four:


Jerramy: "Just the good ole boys..."

Branda: "...never meanin' no harm..."

Jerramy: "Beats all you ever saw-"

Branda: "-been in trouble with the law-"

Together: "SINCE THE DAY THEY WAS BORN!! Woooo hooo!!!"

Mike: "Hey guys, that was...um...great...but we're getting some complaints from-"

Jerramy: "Makin' their wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!.........."

Branda: "......the only way they know how!!......."

Together: "THAT'S JUST A LITTLE BIT MORE THEN THE LAW WILL ALLOW!!!"

Friends don't let drunk friends sing drunk.

Drink number five:



Jerramy: "You know what I like about drinkin'??"

Mike: "Um, what dude?"

Jerramy: (grabs Mike in a bearhug) "EVERYTHING!!!!!! HA HA HA"

Mike: "Okay, okay...let's save the hugging for another day..."

Jerramy: "You know what's in this drink man?"

Mike: "Oh please don't tell me."

Jerramy: "This is paint thinner, orange juice, coffee, and some kind of stool softener."

Mike: "Good heavens man..."



Yes, they even got me up there!! Their feeble attempts to make fun of my name resulted in...well...something that rhymes with "Mike"...any guesses what it was?

The guy next to me was all "He's got a gun!!" which...when he actually looked and saw that I was merely making a gun with my hand, he calmed down and apologized to the entire bar.